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OK Nashville, is no statue safe? - Now, they got Athena.


Nashville, TN - It hasn't even been two weeks since vandals placed masks on the naked figures featured in Music Row's Musica sculpture. Now, they've struck again. This time, they turned their childish acts toward The Parthenon's Athena.


Security officers discovered the 42-feet tall goddess of wisdom and war had been adorned with a custom "mask" when they completed their security walk on Thursday evening.


An unnamed officer described the scene, "Nothing was out of place except for, um, Athena had a...panty on her head... I believe it was a thong."


Reports show that the "mask" was custom-made using several pairs of women's undergarments in order to fit the sculpture's massive head. A local lingerie expert told reporters, "Whoever did this, did their homework. And they took great care to ensure a perfect fit."


Investigators believe that the new act was perpetrated by the same suspects who vandalized Musica on March 20. They are currently processing the scene and interviewing witnesses.


One witness was overheard telling detectives, "I'd bet 52 dollars it was my neighbor, Jimmy Pearl, and his punk friend, Carl. His granny runs a sewing business out of their garage and I heard them in there a hootin' and a hollerin' on Wednesday night."


The Inquisitor reached out to Pearl, but he was not available for comment.


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Good Mental Health is No Joke

The Inquisitor Nashville aims to promote positive mental health through the

power of laughter. If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health

emergency, please encourage them to call the Tennessee Statewide Crisis Line at

1-855-CRISIS-1 (1-855-274-7471).

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