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Drunk Spider-Man balloon found passed out on Broadway; misses Christmas parade

Nashville, TN - According to sources, a Spider-Man balloon that was scheduled to appear in today's Christmas parade failed to show up this morning due to a late night of binge drinking in downtown Nashville.

Witnesses say the polyurethane superhero was found passed out on Broadway in the early hours of Saturday morning and escorted from the area before parade-goers could see it in its compromised position. It never returned to participate in the parade.

We reached out to the owner of the balloon who said, "Listen. Nashville's a fun town. Sometimes, too much fun. We apologize to any disappointed fans and we promise to return next year."

One balloon wrangler came to the defense of the balloon, saying, "We all mistakes and we're all human...even balloons. Let's cut him some slack."

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