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Local teen traumatized after experiencing world without Instagram for 5 hours


Nashville, TN - A local teen is recovering today after surviving a world without Instagram for five hours on Monday.


"She's still in shock," said a family friend. "She's an aspiring influencer, so it was very traumatic."


The visibly shaken teen spoke to reporters outside her home, "My parents have shared stories of the world before Insta, but I didn't realize how awful it must have been for them. I don't know how they made it. I have a new respect for Boomers."


According to reports, the teen spent the downtime continuously refreshing the app, watching Tik Tok videos, and demanding her dad fix the internet.


The girl posted a video on Monday afternoon outlining her harrowing day, "And then my dad suggested I go outside. Are you kidding me, right now? Doesn't he know there are bugs out there?"


Despite Instagram's return, the influencer was furious to find that her last selfie posted moments before the crash had only received two "likes" during the blackout.


She quickly sent a very pointed message to the Instagram support line demanding they give her 100,000 "likes" to make up for the ones she missed.


They have yet to respond to her request.



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Good Mental Health is No Joke

The Inquisitor Nashville is a work of satire. We aim to promote positive mental health through the power of laughter. If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health emergency, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.