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Nashville Shores promises 3% less pee in pools this summer

Updated: May 25, 2019


Nashville shores reducing pee in pools in 2019

Visitors to Nashville Shores’ opening weekend have been posting all over social media about how the popular water park has changed since its 2018 season. The catch is no one could figure out what actually changed. SarahSmiles2001 wrote on Facebook, “I know something is different, but I can’t put my finger on it. I’ve compared the 2018 and 2019 maps and they are the same, so it’s not the layout. Who knows something? GO!”


The Inquisitor has verified that the structure of the park remains unchanged but also learned from an unnamed banana boat operator that there has been at least one significant change behind the scenes. “It’s the pee, man,” the anonymous source told our investigator, “They’ve got this new pumper thing that sucks out the pee like nothing.”


A Nashville Shores representative confirmed this morning that the park has installed a new deluxe filtration system that decreases the amount of urine in most of their pools by 3%. He continued to say that the levels are expected to fall even lower throughout the summer as the marketing team begins implementing Phase 2: a campaign to post 75 “Keep the P out of our OOL” signs throughout the complex.


On hearing the news, SarahSmiles2001 commented, “That’s it! I can believe I missed it. My eyes weren’t burning nearly as bad as last year. Awesome sauce!”


Nashville Shores is now open daily through Sunday, August 4 and weekends through September 15


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