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NFL considers switch to flag football for 2020 season, no butt slaps

Nashville, TN - As businesses across the nation look for new ways to safely operate in a post-pandemic world, the NFL is no exception. Inside sources say the league is considering a switch to flag football for the 2020 season among other changes to promote social distancing.

According to documents, the players' flags would be custom made to six-feet in length to ensure compliance with the recommended distancing guidelines.

Other suggested precautions include mandatory no-huddle offenses, face masks for face masks, expanded spacing of linemen, and no hand-off running plays.

However, the most controversial rumored change for 2020 is the banning of all celebratory butt slaps.

Football fans are already speaking out against this new rule even before it has been officially announced.

One fan told reporters, "I can live with the stupid six-foot flag thing, but it is un-American to take away our butt slap. We need to nip this in the bud, today."

Protest organizers are already forming "Leave Our Butts Alone" rallies to be held across the country later this month. Dates are expected to be announced on Friday.

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