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Trump insists on live, 'on-air' urine tests before debate



Cleveland, OH - After weeks of suggesting Joe Biden is taking performance-enhancing drugs to improve his mental acuity, President Trump is now insisting that both candidates undergo a live, on-air urine test before the debate.


A spokesperson for the president said, "If Sleepy Joe has nothing to hide, he shouldn't have a problem taking a simple, little pee-pee test in front of 10 million viewers."


In a Trump campaign letter to the National Debate Commission, the president outlined his demands.


"The president wants the debate to begin with the national anthem, followed immediately by the live, ON-AIR presidential urine tests. That way the on-site urinalysis team can have the results back before the first question."


The letter went on to say, "President Trump strongly believes that if Sleepy Joe tests positive for enhancement drugs, then Biden should be disqualified and Trump should automatically win the election."


The debate commission has not responded to the demands, but the Biden campaign joked, "We're in, if urine."


This is a developing story.


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Good Mental Health is No Joke

The Inquisitor Nashville is a work of satire. We aim to promote positive mental health through the power of laughter. If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health emergency, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.

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