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Trump reassures jam-packed crowd he is completely safe behind 6-inch plexiglass

Tulsa, OK - An advanced copy of tonight's rally speech in Tulsa, Oklahoma, shows President Trump will begin his remarks by reassuring any health-conscious supporters in the 19,000+ crowd that he is completely safe behind the six-inch plexiglass cage that will surround him.

"You know... thousands of doctors and scientists said I shouldn't be doing a rally. They said it isn't safe," the speech reads. "I don't know about you, but it feels pretty safe to me."

The script then says, "Pause for wild applause."

The president will then officially announce that America has defeated COVID-19 before a banner falls from the ceiling reading, "Mission Accomplished."

From there, Trump is expected to spend much of his speech discussing recent protests, anarchists, and all he has been doing to unite the country.

The speech will end with a group sing-a-long of Oklahoma! from the Broadway musical by Rodgers and Hammerstein.

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Good Mental Health is No Joke

The Inquisitor Nashville aims to promote positive mental health through the

power of laughter. If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health

emergency, please encourage them to call the Tennessee Statewide Crisis Line at 1-855-CRISIS-1 (1-855-274-7471).


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