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JCPenney unveils new Social Distancing clothing line

Nashville, TN - JCPenney unveiled its new Socially Distant clothing line today in an effort to be at the forefront of the burgeoning market for social distancing fashion.

Lead designer, Emmanuel Daniel, told industry professionals via a Skype runway show, "These revolutionary designs will not only reshape the future but will change the face of fashion forever. I applaud JCPenney on their aggressive and courageous approach."

Fashion insiders say that JCPenney created the line and rushed it to market in a little under two weeks and without consumer focus groups. A normal launch would take no less than nine months.

The new clothing line will reportedly include technologically-advanced features such as built-in retractable tape measures to identify safe distances, a volume-ascending alarm that grows louder as people get too close, automatic LED strobes to warn people to stay away, and a low-voltage shocker for those who ignore the warnings.

The $300 million line is scheduled to hit stores and the company's website this Friday.

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