top of page

Wanted: Capitol 'Horn Man' on the run, blending in with crowds

Washington, DC - The FBI is asking for help tracking down the "Horn Man" filmed storming the U.S. Capitol on Wednesday.

An FBI spokesperson told reporters, "We have reason to believe the suspect is hitchhiking west to Arizona, blending in with crowds at Starbucks and other businesses along the way."

The tattooed man is 6 feet tall (6'4" with horns), has blue eyes and brown fur. He is armed with a spear wrapped in an American flag, and his face is painted red, white, and blue.

"We are asking all Americans to be hyper-vigilant to find this man. He is a master blender," said the spokesperson.

A recent sighting led agents to a Walmart in Mississippi, but it turned out to be a different horned man covered in pagan tattoos.

If you have any information about his whereabouts, please contact the Crime Busters hotline immediately.

Good Mental Health is No Joke

The Inquisitor Nashville is a work of satire. We aim to promote positive mental health through the power of laughter. If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health emergency, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
bottom of page