Search

With asteroid poised to destroy Earth on Nov. 2, candidates encourage early voting



Washington, D.C. - According to reports, Democrats and Republicans have finally found something they agree on: Early Voting.


The push comes after NASA announced that Asteroid 2018VP1 could make contact with Earth just one day before the election, on November 2. Although the asteroid is only 6.5 feet and would most likely burn up in the planet's atmosphere, both campaigns are using the event to get constituents to the polls.


"I hear from some very, very smart people that it could cause a huge amount of devastation," said Trump at a recent rally. "They say the only thing more likely to destroy the planet is Biden and the radical left. We can't let that happen. Vote early."


Trump added that an asteroid strike, even a tiny one that no one notices, could delay the election results for "many, many years," but he is willing to stay in office until they figure out who won.


Joe Biden told reporters, "Come on man, you got to vote early. Look, even if we survive the asteroid, we won't survive four more years of Trump. It's a simple choice. This president can't lead us through a virus, imagine him trying to lead us through a global apocalypse. Go vote."


Both candidates say they are watching the situation very closely and will be spending November 2 in their respective bunker or basement, just in case.



For more unbelievable stories, follow us on Facebook.


Good Mental Health is No Joke

The Inquisitor Nashville aims to promote positive mental health through the

power of laughter. If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health

emergency, please encourage them to call the Tennessee Statewide Crisis Line at 1-855-CRISIS-1 (1-855-274-7471).

  • White Facebook Icon

© 2019 Inquisitor Nashville